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Friday, July 12, 2024

Cheria hole filled:

When I added a sexy scene for Elize in Chapter 31 a few editions back I inadvertently created a plot hole because Elize was supposed to be in a threesome with Leia for that moment, not seducing Christopher all on her own.  However, Elize's scene is too good to pass by, so I switched the threesome to Sophie and Cheria.  Sophie also had her own solo sex scene but it wasn't too good to pass by, so I replaced it with this sex scene instead.  The end result is one more girl gets characterized than before, Cheria, a girl who hasn't received many lines up until now.  (It's crazy how changing just one thing requires so many cascading corrections throughout the book though.  Editing is hard.):

* * *

  “I spent my whole life trying to beat Sophie and this is my reward.” Cheria grumbled. Of course the pairing was inevitable precisely due to that rivalry, which only here could be resolved in the most obvious way, the way every love triangle between equally wonderful girls should be resolved.

  "I'll sit on his tongue so you can take his member." Sophie graciously gave Cheria the pole position.

  "Wait!" I protested. "What's the point if I can't see your bodies?" The entire purpose of a threesome was getting to look at four breasts, not zero!

  "So what do you want to do with the two of us?" Cheria asked, perplexed as to how three people could fit together any other way.

  "Sophie, sit on my left. Cheria, sit on my right. Then kiss your pussies to either side of my erection." I explained.

  "You want me to scissor Sophie with only your dick inbetween?" Cheria's face went redder and redder.

  "Don't worry Cheria, I've always loved both of you like family." Sophie encouraged while placidly complying, stripping and nestling in to her assigned location.

  "Urrgh." Cheria had no answer to Sophie's innocence. As someone who owed her health and life to the robot she somehow felt compelled to follow suit. The heat where the three of us conjoined was tremendous.

* * *

My reread has reached Chapter 35 and it's as I thought -- there was nothing inherently bad about this section of the story, it was only the poor delivery holding it back.  Obviously having to memorize so many names all at once is a major undertaking, but lazy readers can skip all that if they want, and the rest of the content in this zone holds up fine.  Also, the names are of great people so it really isn't as much of a hassle at it seems.  Name galleries are actually pretty fun once you realize they're a method of characterizing the mothers and nostalgia inducing.  But either way readers approach this section, it ends with Chapter 37 so I'm almost out of the doldrums and on to Cute's intro.  Once Cute arrives it's basically smooth sailing from there.

For people who don't understand the reference to Dark Dream and Dark Lemonade, I suggest you watch the Yes Precure 5 Movie: Kagami no Kuni no Miracle Daibouken.  I watched it yesterday yet again and it was still moving -- though not as moving as the Splash Star movie, which lacks the miracle light crap and is thus serious throughout.  The Splash Star movie makes it painfully clear how much Mai loves Saki, at the end of the movie they practically confess to each other, and combined with how beautiful she looks in her custom movie-wear skirt it decisively proves why Mai belongs in '100 Waifus' as one of the greatest women and greatest romances ever.  The Nozomi-Coco romance in Kagami no Kuni isn't bad at all, but it doesn't hold a candle to Splash Star's.

My favorite chapter so far is Chapter 11.  The many dates Christopher goes on with such varied people creates a rising tide of warmth and fuzziness all the way to the shocking turn of events which suddenly raises the stakes to the dramatic maximum.  It reminds me of Saki's birthday party in Followers and Emulators, where fun and games at the amusement park suddenly turns into a life and death battle.  The only story that compares to '100 Waifus' is the Wyrd saga, and conversely the only story that compares to the Wyrd saga is '100 Waifus.'

In other news Sokushi Cheat now has a reasonably sized bluray release, so be sure to make use of it for your permanent archive.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

"Don't worry Cheria, I've always loved both of you like family."

Dude, you have some serious problems if that is how your family "loves" each other. Are you lusting after your mother or some shit lol wtf bro.