I realized yesterday my praise of Mumei was so well crafted it belonged in '100 Waifus,' so I added this segment to chapter 55 in order to include it. Mumei was one of the least talked about girls in the novel so she really deserved this.
*
* *
"Mumei,
you've worked at Police Headquarters for a long time now without
solving a single crime. Would you prefer to be reassigned, for
instance to the studio as a dancer?" I offered my condolences.
"Police
are foremost deterrents to crime, only secondarily punishers of it."
Hozumi defended her honor. "And it's not like I'm doing
nothing at all. I patrol the streets, mediate arguments, fetch
kittens from trees, return lost items to their owners and lost
children to their parents, and put in a lot of training to stay in
top condition."
I
loved Mumei so much. Graceful either in battle or while dancing with
twintails in a completely peaceful setting. Totally in love and
totally embarrassed about it like the bashful maiden she was. Ready
to do anything for her friends and ready to rain judgment down upon
her enemies. Capable of crying and killing in the same day.
Combined with the insane beauty of face and form. . .how could anyone
ever get enough of her? But if she was content where I'd stationed
her, I guess getting to see her regularly as a yosakoi performer was
an idle dream.
"When
you were cured of your negative status effects, did it also weaken
your physical abilities?" I asked with a different concern. If
she weren't superhuman anymore, she was just a little girl who should
be the last person on patrol.
Mumei
let the red leylines of energy emerge across her face and picked up
my prided oaken desk with one hand. "This really isn't my
forte, I have more stats in agility than strength, but your office is
too small to really show that off." She grumbled through
labored breath.
My
desk! My poor desk! My closest companion for over 100 years was in
a pinch! "Point taken!" I yelped in a high voice.
"Orihime's
power can reject anything. It doesn't have to revert me to my
original human state, it can reject only the bad side effects and
leave the good ones. Aizen said it, didn't he?: 'Orihime's power is
the power of God.'" Mumei carefully set the desk back down with
a triumphant grin.
Some
girls were so critical to Paradise's functioning that I worried what
we would do without them, like Orihime, Usagi and Sakura Kinomoto. I
didn't want to pressure them into unending servitude, but I prayed to
Cute-sama they'd stay happy for as long as possible. They were
irreplaceable existences.
"Well
if you're ideal for policing, at least let me offer you a promotion.
As one of the original policemen, you should lord it over the
latecomers like Lafiel." I enticed.
"Are
you trying
to create friction between your waifus?" Mumei glared death at
me.
"Okay,
final offer, can I buy you a scoop of ice cream?" I surrendered
entirely.
Hozumi's
youjo face lit up excitedly as she ran over to embrace my arm and pull me out of my chair.
"Finally
something sensible!"
*
* *
I also corrected another Mumei plot hole in this line (the new section is highlighted in bold for the reader's convenience:
I even became a crack shot -- though guns (outside of Makina's sniper rifle and Mumei's steam-punk armaments which were part of their identity) didn't even exist in Eden, nor would any weapon of mass destruction if I had my way.
It's only a matter of time before I start my 19th re-read of the best book ever written, but edits like this make each new foray worthwhile.
No comments:
Post a Comment