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Wednesday, December 4, 2019

Plot Hole Re-Filled:

I decided it was better to 'show' than 'tell,' so instead of just saying Christopher filled all his waifus in on what was going on, I would narrate the whole event from start to finish.  It's a rather important scene so glossing over the contents doesn't make much sense.  The new and improved version of the beginning of Chapter 3 reads like this:

Chapter 3:

  Waking up from our second night together was a good deal better than the first. This time Sakura Kinomoto had made sure there was at least a floor beneath us, a roof overhead, and an endless array of futons lying side by side on the currently empty wood for us to sleep with together. In truth, I hadn't gotten much sleep, however, and had instead been dreading the break of dawn, as I went over and over in my head what I wanted to say.
  "Okay everyone, gather around. As Mayor I have a major announcement." Now that everyone had had a good night's sleep with a roof over their heads, I felt this was a necessity. God had created such an obviously paradoxical situation there was no way I could cover it up through good acting for long, and if they figured it out on their own while I was still trying to deceive them I could irreparably lose their trust. Only the truth would suffice now.
  "I gather from the conversations so far that each of you thinks I'm your dearly beloved. For instance, Ai recognizes me as 'shishou,' which would be Yaichi from Ryuuou no Oshigoto." I began my explanation with trepidation.
  Ai nodded, not seeing the problem.
  "But it's obviously impossible for me to be both Yaichi from Ryuuou no Oshigoto and Endymion from Sailor Moon. So one or the other of you is wrong, right?" I pointed out the obvious contradiction that must have been bedeviling them up until now.
  "Well the answer is you're all wrong. I'm none of those people, but only a human from Earth named Christopher. I died in a truck accident and my soul rose up to meet God in heaven, where she commiserated with my loss and offered me a new life with any one granted wish to even the scales. The wish I asked for was you. I wanted to marry all of you. For that to happen, to gain your willing participation, God had to transplant your feelings for your most special person onto me, which is the cause of the multiple personality overlay. If that most special person was originally a female, she gave you an alternate memory of having instead had said relationship with me, a male, from the beginning, while still preserving the original memory intact as well, giving you a sort of twice-lived life. The same is true of Wakaba, who is also Akane, and has memories from both lives equally inside of her." I explained. Wakaba nodded, suddenly getting why she could remember growing up in two different places with two different names among two different families with a deep sense of relief.
  "Before you go blaming God for granting such an unreasonable wish, I need to explain something else. All 100 of you were created by God just for this moment, just to be my wives, so at no point was anything taken from you. Originally, you were only characters I fell for in various stories told on Earth, computer code or black squiggles on paper. Your bodies and souls, your memories and personalities and feelings, were all hand crafted by God's imagination based on said stories and the prerequisites of my wish, and came into existence whole just two days ago. In a sense, you had nothing to lose, so the life God has given you as my wife can only be a plus for both of us."
  "I have only the deepest admiration for all the men you see me as, so relating to all of you as said figures isn't a problem for me. I'll always try to live up to their example, but remember I'm not actually any of them. I don't have their superhuman abilities, their winning personalities, or even their names. I can only do my best, as Christopher, to make each and every one of you happy in the only way I know how, as myself."
  "If any of you find this hard to swallow, I can easily enough demonstrate my veracity. Louise, you can open up a portal to Earth with void magic, right?" I singled my pink-haired waifu out from the crowd. She nodded gingerly so I gestured her forward.
  Louise walked up next to me and took out her wand, starting a long chant and giving it a try. With a look of pleased surprise, Louise watched as the portal opened up in front of the entire crowd. "Now if you could enter my old place at this address and retrieve all the books you can see, the truth should become readily apparent." I handed her a map.
  Louise nodded and concentrated, the portal shifting its focus to the new location. She then hopped through and came back a few minutes later after rummaging through my stuff. Light novels with her own illustration on the cover as well as manga and game cd covers of many others in the area spilled out of her arms and onto the wooden floor of our newly summoned mansion.
  The girls gathered around as their eyes widened in shock. Leafing through the contents of the pages, events they had thought private and known only to themselves about their lives were displayed for all the world to see.
  "I know all your back stories because I fell in love with your stories. I know you all as well as your most special person knew you back home or better, depending on the story's perspective. These back stories are why I fell for you just as much as they are why you have fallen for me. With these stories as our foundation, I have no doubt our loves can blossom in this new world without losing in the least to what's come before." I prophesied.
  "I'm sorry none of you got to meet God, she was even brusque with me so I guess it couldn't be helped, but surely only a miracle could account for all of you appearing here at once, all from different worlds, all with your powers intact, all able to communicate with each other, and all in love with me. And where there are miracles there must be Gods, so my account should be just as believable to you as it is to me, the very person who met her." I hoped.
  "If, knowing this, any of you wish to walk away or delete yourselves, there's nothing I can do to stop you. I won't force you into anything. But I would still implore you all to at least give 'us' a try first. We've done well so far, so why not into the future as well? This is a really great collection of people, I guarantee it. With your help, I promise to make all our new lives a Paradise without equal." I solemnly swore. After that all I could do was stand nervously in front of them and await their verdict.
  Teletha looked at the cover of Full Metal Panic!, then back to my face, then back to the books again. After that she took a deep breath and looked me in the face. "Even if you tell me you're not actually him, even though I can see your face and the face on the book is different, I can only see you as him. Every memory in my mind and every instinct in my body confirms it. I suppose if it's all true, and God wanted to make sure we loved you to fulfill your wish, this is one feeling that cannot budge. I guess that means I can't help but play into God's hands and love you all the same. Nor do I see any reason to prevent my own happiness. Marrying you was my dream, so why should I have to go out of my way to spoil it myself?"
  A lot of the other girls started nodding and murmuring in agreement as she spoke, until by the end she received a standing ovation.
  "If you thought you could weasel your way out of marrying me and run away again you've got another thing coming." Louise grabbed my arm and glomped herself against it possessively. After Saito pulled the mother of all ditchings by trying to run back home the day after their second wedding night I guess she had rightfully gotten a little paranoid.
  "The white-haired girl speaks for me!" A voice far back in the crowd concurred.
  "Me too! And me! Me!" More voices rang out. It looked like God's method of pairing us up wasn't so fragile or ad hoc after all. I had my doubts but I guess omniscience knew what it was about.
  "In that case, I guess the next order of business is introductions. For instance, the white-haired girl is Teletha Testarossa from Full Metal Panic! Once we've brought all your source works over, it would be helpful if you all read up on each other, but for now I can at least tell you each other's names and the basic outline of your various settings. This may take a while so let's form a queue and I can introduce each of you to the crowd one by one, for everyone who wants to give life here a try."
  In the end all 100 lined up and, with the help of Riko's refreshments, I talked long into the night.

* * *

  After two weeks of Sakura-based construction and manufacturing everyone had been able to move in to their new rooms enjoying modern amenities. Life was at least up to 1950's standards for all. The next step was expanding our residential district into a commercial, civic, recreational and industrial district. My waifus tended to be passionate in the pursuit of jobs or hobbies so there needed to be a space where they could be themselves if I wanted this village to truly approach the standards of 'Paradise.'


This already perfect book is getting even better with its 15th revision so there's every reason to dive in and try it out for yourselves.  This time the plot hole has been well and truly filled.

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