The Long Wait: Update 6

Waitlist Anime:  The K-On movie is coming out on blu-ray in July, so it'll probably be translated in August.  The Kobato specials are complete, but still no sign of progress on the actual blu-ray episodes.  47/50 of Fresh Pretty Cure is out, 42/49 Yes! Pretty Cure 5 episodes are out, and 12/48 Yes! Pretty Cure 5 GoGo episodes are out.  That's a lot of Pretty Cure Progress!  Steins;Gate is still stalled.

Now to Spring Anime:

The long awaited Akb0048.  How was it?  Fantastic!  I don't know why the future hates entertainment, but these things happen.  Puritans and Muslims banned song and dance, so why not future civilizations too?  The setting doesn't need to make sense though, just accept it and move on.  Behind the curtain lies an amazing vista of interesting characters and beautifully animated songs and dances.  It reminds me of Idolmaster, minus any attempt at realism.  Of course it will never be as good as Idolmaster, but to even remind me of Idolmaster is great.  This show is great fun.

Sakamichi no Apollon and Accel World both sported love confessions this week.  I'm going to take a moment to complain about this now.  Studies show that only 2% of successful marriages are by high school sweethearts.  All the others break up.  High School couples have a lot going against them.  Because neither member of the couple has a secure job or a college degree, they'll likely both be moving somewhere else, far away from the other member of the couple, in order to provide for themselves.  It would take a miracle for them both to go to the same college, graduate school, and get a job in the same city.  If at any step they cease to be together, their relationship will die soon thereafter.  What are the odds they'll succeed?

Furthermore, high schoolers aren't settled in their lifestyles or beliefs.  They are in a state of constant flux.  What they might find attractive in another boy or girl during high school could change by the time they are 20 or 30.  They might hate the very same person they 'love' today, even without them changing or becoming worse in any way.  Many people don't live up to their potential, and instead take up alcohol, drugs, laziness, cheating, or just any sort of vice.  How can the 'love' born in high school for a completely different, pure and unsullied person last after they've destroyed themselves?

Is there any proof this love can last?  One reason couples fall apart is nothing but time.  Once the novelty of your feelings wears off, will you really find the person next to you as attractive, exciting, and interesting as you did upon first meeting?  It's all well and good to think your 'love' is super duper amazing, and that your feelings won't lose to time, but until you've actually been together for five or ten years, there's no way to know.  Only those who have crossed that barrier have the right to say they can cross that barrier, everyone else is just giving vent to cheap, and ultimately meaningless, words.  Words, words, words.  Show me with your actions that you're in love.  Everyone, everywhere, uses the same damn word, but in the end it never amounts to anything.  99.9999% of people who 'love' each other break up.  If that's love then love is worthless.

It's ridiculous to refer to some childhood infatuation, where you're simply starstruck by how pretty a girl in your class is, without even knowing anything about her, as 'love.'  It's an insult to the term, and the concept, of romance.  It's a perfectly common feeling and there's nothing wrong with it, per se, but turning that into some sort of serious 'confession' when it's the least serious and most flighty feeling in the world is where the sacrilege begins.

If you want me to believe in the power of your love, then overcome obstacles that other lovers can't.  Show me you're the real deal by your actions.  There are a variety of things that break lovers up, face each of these things and then Don't break up.  Or even better, face obstacles out of this world worse than most lovers' obstacles and overcome THEM.  This is what Clannad, Kanon, Da Capo and Ef did.  At that point I'll start to believe you.  Before anyone confesses their feelings to anyone, their feelings should have become apparent through their actions and the way the couple, without even being a couple, talks and looks and feels around each other.  There's no need to put these chains of affection into words, in fact they're better when they go unsaid.  True affection can develop when there are no expectations and no demands, when it's still possible to back out with honor, where people are free to be themselves and just see what happens.  A friendship like that can be far more than dating, because it doesn't rely on sexual attraction or sexual gratification to keep building up more and more love for the other person, but simply on each other's company.  Someday all those teenage hormones demanding sex will fade away, as will even the looks of your partner -- how will your love remain unless sex wasn't at the heart of your friendship from the start?

In any case, people shouldn't carelessly confess their feelings for someone until they're so clear as day in their actions that no one can doubt their honesty, devotion, and determination.  If the other person isn't even aware of your feelings before you confess them, you're not close enough to have the right to confess in the first place.  If the other person doesn't evince any desire to be confessed to, again you simply don't have the right to confess to them and put a burden on them they did not desire.  If you don't understand the rules of courtship, read Jane Austen.  Relationships built slowly, and confessions only came after the fact, after everything was silently understood and desired by both members of the couple.  That's a beautiful relationship.  That's love.

Sakamichi no Apollon and Accel World both broke those rules, and as a result earned my disgust.  For that matter the stupid judo guy with a crush on Medaka broke the rule in Medaka Box as well.  Anyone who just blurts out their unilateral feelings of being starstruck with a boy or girl, without any relationship to base it off, and without any proof that their feelings could last, is the worst.  To go ahead and have the arrogance to say that you're 'in love' with said person, of all things, is just smearing mud all over Aphrodite's altar.  Come back in ten years and then speak of love.  Why do they think they can love a girl or boy romantically, one of the most majestic feats on Earth, when they're still just a bunch of annoying children?  Can they write as well as Shakespeare?  Can they make as much money as Rockefeller?  So why do they think they can love like an old married couple?  Unless they put actual effort into becoming a good person who can love someone always and forever, I really don't want to hear their mindless, empty words.

Take a page from Jhinto and Lafiel from Crest of the Stars.  Now that was romantic love.  God was it beautiful.  Love like that is the most glorious thing under the heavens.  'Love' short of that, however, is found in every corner of every closet in the land, and is hardly worth writing a story about.  I don't watch entertainment to see mediocre people do mediocre things I could see just as well on the news.  I watch it for great people to do great things, that I can't see anywhere else.  For the same reason, I want to watch the Summer Olympics, not the Summer Kids Camp Peewee competition.  I'm here to scale heights, not spelunk caves.  Christ.

For that reason, all these love stories get a downrank.  You want a real love story?  Hunter x Hunter.  Gon and Killua are a better couple than any of these losers.

This finally rounds up the spring anime season, so here are the new tiers:

Must See:

Fate/Zero
One Piece
Smile Precure

Should See:

Hunter x Hunter
Saki Achiga
Hyouka
Naruto (now that it's no longer filler again)

No Harm in Seeing:

Kore wa Zombie Desuka?
Kuroko no Basuke
Ginga E Kickoff
The Knight Area
Sankarea
AKB0048

If You're Bored:

Kimi to Boku
Mouretsu Pirates
Kuromajyo-san
Haiyore
Natsuiro Kiseki
Shining Hearts
Space Brothers
Dusk Maiden of Amnesia
Accel World
Sakamichi no Apollon
Medaka Box

Everything Else:

Not worth watching.

Meanwhile, by combining Baccano and Durarara, I put myself in an inconsistent pickle.  It meant I should also combine Umineko no Naku Koro Ni with Higurashi, because Rika appears in both and they're both mystery series.  Likewise Triangle Hearts combines with Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha.   However, I don't feel that Card Captor Sakura combines with Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles.  This is because, despite the fact that Sakura and Shaoron are in both series, they're alternate universe Sakuras and Shaorons, that really have no relation to their previous existence in Card Captor Sakura, except that they love each other.  Only their names, looks, and relationship are the same -- they aren't actually the same people, nor do the two series have any thematic or flavorful relationship to each other.  In fact, the two series couldn't be more different from each other in genre, tone, or message.  Index and Railgun I'd already fused together as a single entity, so I think everything is consistent again.

So here's the new rankings with all the fusions in mind:

1. Clannad (2007-2009) 
2. Pretty Cure (2004-2012+)
3. One Piece (1999-2012+)
4. Code Geass (2006-2009+)
5. Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha/Triangle Hearts (2000-2010+)
6. Seikai no Monshou/Senki/Danshou (1999-2005)
7. Fairy Tail (2009-2012+)
8. Naruto (2002-2012+)
9. Dragonball (1986-2011)
10. Higurashi/Umineko no Naku Koro Ni (2006-2012)
11. K-On! (2009-2011)
12. Kanon (2002-2007)
13. Haruhi Suzumiya (2006-2010)
14. Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann (2007-2009)
15. To Aru Majutsu no Index/Kagaku no Railgun (2008-2011+)
16. Angel Beats (2010)
17. Puella Magi Madoka Magica (2011+)
18. Da Capo (2003-2011)
19. Katanagatari (2010)
20. The Idolm@ster (2011+)
21. Full Metal Panic! (2002-2006)
22. Bakuman (2010-2012+)
23. Kobato (2009-2012)
24. Working! (2010-2012+)
25. Record of Lodoss War (1990-1998)
26. The World God Only Knows (2010-2011)
27. Hayate no Gotoku (2007-2012+)
28. Vandread (2000-2001)
29. Sora no Woto (2010)
30. Toradora! (2008-2011)
31. Evangelion (1995-2009+)
32. Basilisk (2005)
33. Galaxy Angel (2001-2006)
34. Saki (2009-2012+)
35. Major (2004-2012)
36. Prince of Tennis (2001-2012)
37. Inuyasha (2000-2010)
38. Ranma 1/2 (1989-2008)
39. Sailor Moon (1992-1997)
40. Air (2005)
41. Hanasaku Iroha (2011+)
42. Usagi Drop (2011-2012)
43. Angelic Layer (2001)
44. Rurouni Kenshin (1996-2011+)
45. Kiki's Delivery Service (1989)
46. Ef (2007-2008)
47. Ore no Immouto ga Konna ni Kawaii Wake ga Nai (2010-2011+)
48. Uuchuu no Stellvia (2003)
49. Utawarerumono (2006-2010)
50. Summer Wars (2009)
51. Baka to Test to Shoukanjuu (2010-2012)
52. Cowboy Bebop (1998-2001)
53. Samurai Champloo (2004-2005)
54. Battle Athletes (1997-1998)
55. Bleach (2004-2012)
56. Bake-(etc)-monogatari (2009-2012+)
57. Amagami SS (2010-2012)
58. Macross (1982-2011)
59. 12 Kingdoms (2002-2003)

60. Mononoke Hime (1997)
61. Ano Hi Mita Hana no Namae o Bokutachi wa Mada Shiranai (2011)

62. Berserk (1997-2012+)
63. Claymore (2007)
64. Valkyria Chronicles (2009-2011)
65. Negima! Magister Magi Negi (2004-2012)
66. Sora no Otoshimono (2009-2012+)
67. Strike Witches (2007-2012)
68. Nichijou (2011-2012+)
69. Hunter x Hunter (1999-2012+)
70. Fate/Stay/Etc (2006-2012+)
71. Card Captor Sakura (1998-2000)
72. Gundam (1979-2012+)
73. Shakugan no Shana (2005-2012)
74. Martian Successor Nadesico (1996-1998)
75. Read or Die (2001-2004)
76. Break Blade (2010-2011)
77. Kimi ni Todoke (2009-2011)
78. Spice and Wolf (2008-2009)
79. To Heart (1999-2012+)

80. Bastard! (1992)

81. Mahoromatic (2001-2009)
82. Akane-iro ni Somaru Saka (2008-2009)
83. Fatal Fury (1992-1994)
84. Lucky Star (2007-2008)
85. Azumanga Daioh (2002)
86. Alien Nine (2001-2002)
87. Iria: Zeiram the Animation (1994)
88. Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind (1984)
89. Guyver (1986-2006)

90. Spirited Away (2001)
91. Grave of the Fireflies (1988)
92. Scrapped Princess (2003)
93. Steins;Gate (2011-2012+)
94. Gunbuster (1988-2012)
95. Shamanic Princess (1996-1998)
96. Boku ha Tomodachi ga Sukunai (2011)

97. Papa no Iukoto wo Kikinasai (2012+)

98. Akira (1988)
99. Moshidora (2011)
100. High School of the Dead (2010-2011)
101. Flame of Recca (1997-1998)
102. Hikaru no Go (2001-2004)

103. Shinryaku! Ika Musume (2010-2011+)
104. Ghost in the Shell (1995-2011)
105. Tamayura (2010-2011+)
106. Zero no Tsukaima (2006-2012)

107. Soul Eater (2008-2009)
108. Sora no Manimani (2009)
109. Kanokon (2008-2009)
110. Gosick (2011)

111. Baccano/Durara (2007-2011)

112. Ninja Scroll (1993-2003+)

113. Howl’s Moving Castle (2004)

114. Death Note (2006-2008)

115. Tokyo Magnitude 8.0 (2009)

116. Saint Tail (1994-1996)

117. RG Veda (1991-1992)

118. The Girl Who Leapt Through Time (2006)

119. X  (1996-2002)

120. Hyouka (2012+)