Summer 2016 Anime First Impressions:

ReLife:  There's really no point to a first impression of this show, since the entire season was released all at once.  If people like the show they can just watch it, and if they don't they can stop at any time.  Given that, what can I say about the show?  On the one hand, it seems to be a well done comedy with likable characters.  On the other hand it has a rather lame plot and setting, so it can't be called great or anything.  On the gripping hand, seeing as how I watched the entire show in a single day, it definitely qualifies as a good show.  Pass.

Rewrite:  We were warned ahead of time that this wouldn't be the Rewrite we all knew and loved.  Even so, the first episode mainly followed the script.  The nostalgic soundtrack played, the nostalgic voice actors spoke their nostalgic lines, the nostalgic character designs were well animated, and all is right with the world.  They are zooming through the common route and it obviously won't be long before we enter terra incognita, but even so, even with just this one episode, it's already a great anime.  I'm happy at least this much was done right.  Pass.

Days:  The unrealistic level of injuries the character kept suffering while, like a loony tunes character, never being adversely affected by them afterwards led me to abort the episode halfway through.  Completely unacceptable depiction of the sport.  Fail.

Orange:  This is a famously popular and critically acclaimed series, but so far nothing it has shown is actually good.  The time travel back to school trope is way overused recently and is causing a conditioned gag reflex even in otherwise good series.  In addition, the shoujo tropes also weigh it down and make it hard for a man to enjoy.  The first episode was very dull.  It never answered the question 'why should we, the audience, care?'  However, since it's been praised to the moon, I'll give it another chance in the upcoming episodes to prove itself.  Pass.

New Game:  Everyone knew this would be a great anime, and it was.  Gorgeous, charming and funny.  What better life than doing something you love, making a product you respect, with nice people you can get along with?  New Game is about good people doing good things and receiving neverending karmic blessings along the way.  A simple story, perhaps, but such a solid concept, and the animation company has executed it splendidly.  Pass.

Taboo Tattoo:  This show is way too intent on delivering fanservice.  Whether it's big bouncing breasts or cool fight scenes with the camera zooming and spinning around randomly, it's super intent on showing off how very hip it is.  There's no story aside from 'look at this!  Look at me! I'm so cool!'  I guess young boys could dig this show, but it's just too dumb for anyone else.  Fail.

Amaama to Inuzuma:  I've seen good stories of single dads with young daughters.  Aisheteruze Baby, Usagi Drop, Clannad, PapaKiki.  This is not one of those stories.  It pales in comparison.  It doesn't hit any of the right notes.  The daughter seems ill defined, acting more mature at some moments than is possible and more childish at other times than you would expect.  However, there's nothing exactly blameworthy about the show.  As far as it being a cooking and eating story, Koufuku Graffitti was much more emotional and deep, but not many shows are as good as Koufuku, so. . .  I guess it's as good a way to pass the time as any.  Pass.

Regalia - The three sacred stars:  This show would be perfect if it weren't so corny.  Villains who are overly villainous for the joy of villainy.  Ridiculous secrets that stretch all suspension of disbelief flying in one after the other.  The sheer convenience of complete noobs being able to pilot mecha effortlessly.  If you want to watch this series, be very open minded, because this show doesn't wait for anyone before it pulls its next major stunt.  I love it all the same, though, because the girls are cute and they care about each other, which is pretty much my favorite theme in all storytelling.  Strike Witches rules because it uses this theme.  So does Idolm@ster, Love Live, Yuru Yuri, Binbou Shimai Monogatari, Rocket Girls, etc, etc.  This theme will never fail, so I'm sure Regalia will rock too.  Pass. 

Planetarian:  Not only is this show part of my top anime rankings, it's probably going to be the anime of the year.  There's no telling how good it can be until the very end, but if you watch anything, watch Planetarian.  If you're seeking catharsis then this is the place to be.  Key at its best, and finally for once properly adapted.  It doesn't get much better than this.  Pass.

Alderamin of the Sky:  Way too many proper names.  Jesus Christ.  I've never seen so many specialized nouns in my life.  Everybody had a first, middle, and last name.  They came from diverse regions with many syllables.  They all had specialized equipment, fairies, and titles.   Please, make it stop.  Meanwhile, this ludicrously arrogant series which thinks viewers will give them all the attention necessary to memorize all these names has a main character who rapes women and abuses children.  And we're supposed to rally behind this guy because he's so smart and cool.  Jesus Christ.  The good art in this show is totally wasted on a plot that is just shameful to have ever been published, much less received an anime.  I feel bad for the studio and voice actors who had to work on this show.  Fail.

Amanchu:  In this modern age, having such deplorably low budget, low quality art is just unacceptable.  There is a certain minimum standard I expect from shows, and Amanchu didn't even try to meet it.  The faces looked awful, when they even bothered to draw them, the costumes looked awful, there's no way girls could even walk in those tube skirts, and it made them look like gourds with giant hips and butts that no girl would be caught dead wearing it's so ghastly.  Azumanga Daioh looked way better than this show, even though it was just a joke show with no attempt at looking serious or realistic.  There wasn't much of a plot because this show is very slow paced, but I don't care if this was narrating the word of God, with art this bad, it still would've sucked.  Fail.

Time Travel Shoujo:  Like that one series that explains Peter Drucker via a stretched thin story about a baseball club, this show is trying to explain science through  stretched thin time traveler.  The problem is shows designed to explain aren't very entertaining and the forced narrative doesn't flow naturally anymore because it's trying to get the job done instead of present a realistic scenario.  Fail.

91 Days:  A horrible story where everyone is killing, beating, destroying property, drinking, smoking, befouling their own nests, insulting each other, etc, etc.  A completely senseless, depraved story about nothing.  If humans were anything like how they're depicted in this show they should be driven to extinction immediately.  Luckily, this story isn't realistic in the least and nobody acts like this, so the story is also completely unbelievable.  Fail.

Kono Bijutsubu ni wa Mondai ga Aru:  This romantic comedy holds promise.  The art is fantastic and the characters are likable, especially the girl.  My only complaint is the plot refuses to move forward and it's already getting to feel repetitive despite the fact that only one episode has aired.  You can generally avoid repetitiveness by introducing a new character every episode, but even that gets stale fast if you introduce too many and they all start feeling like an amorphous blob of plot excuses to resuscitate a long dead series.  There's no good answer to this.  Almost every comedy series starts to feel too repetitive really early on.  It's what makes writing good comedy so hard, only the best of the best can even begin to compete with even run of the mill action adventures.  I wish this show the best of luck, but I've seen many other romantic comedies crash and burn under the exact same beginning circumstances.  Pass.

Qualidea Code:  This is the best first episode of a series I wasn't already aware of.  It has some annoying tropes, like the overly gruff powerful male lead, and the overly useless and helpless heroine he has to take care of in a tsundere manner, and seemingly non-sentient swarms of alien invaders that only people with superpowers can oppose, etc, etc.  But it takes that generic formula and creates some heart pounding, thrilling action sequences, a ton of really likable characters, and a story that seems to be bursting with possibility from here on out.  I really like the idea that all the old people in the world are dead and now the world consists solely of kids.  Talk about a revolution, it's the stuff of dreams for us young 'uns.  Pass.

Ange Vierge:  An entire episode full of nudity, and steam, and light beams.  What a giant tease.  On other fronts, the plot was way too generic and overly convenient as a method of getting the characters to be appealing and do what the authors wanted them to do.  Fluff best describes this series.  Fail.

Still to come:  Naria Girls and Battery.

Well, that's most of the series worthy of a first impression.  I'll cover the other two once they're out.  The expected shows were great and the unexpected shows were generally mediocre.  It's a strong season, but the dark horses didn't do much to add to the summer's value.  With Rewrite, Planetarian and New Game, I don't demand any dark horses emerge, though.  This is fine as is.